Liberty

Tonight's meeting topic was liberty. That struck me as really odd at first. The reading was about if a person was free from fear, resentment and alcohol, they would have the liberty to become well and anyone would do it given freedom of choice. It seems like a strange topic, but I think it really applied to me. I was a slave, not so much to alcohol, but to the things I was afraid of. There's a long list of things, from being forgotten or alone, to losing my job, not being able to provide for my family, and many many other things. those fears ran my life. My fears also included a fear that I might be an alcoholic. My Grandmother Heltzel was always afraid she would get cancer. As a result, she never went to a Doctor because she was afraid of finding out she had cancer. She worked as a Nurses Aid in LaGrange and died of Viral Hepatitis should probably contracted at work because she never went to a Doctor about her symptoms. I needed to go to AA a long time ago, and life for all of us would have been easier- but I was afraid to find out I was an alcoholic. Instead I tried to fix things myself---- which obviously didn't go to well. Now I feel free and liberated for the first time in years, and I'm so, so grateful.